Serving Together

Just got back from journey #3 to Haiti. Todd was with me this time, so it was a new experience for both of us. It was insanely cool to take a trip like that with my spouse. We've walked on beaches and toured beautiful cities, but there is a new beauty in sweating through 100 degree weather together with precious Haitian children grasping every available piece of clothing on you. I looked over to see him playing dominoes, and even through his sweat and old t-shirt I asked him to toss forever ago, I had never wanted to hug him so much. He was such a picture of a real man to me. Sadly, these children do not get attention and love from a male figure very often, so he must have been like an angel to them. As a couple, we support the cause of Sweet Sleep (sweetsleep.org) and caring for orphans. I encourage you and your partner to support and serve a cause you believe in together. You might just find more admiration for each other as you love others together.

Every step of the journey is the journey

"Every step of the journey is the journey" - I found this quote on a card I picked up for my husband recently. I wish I could quote someone for it, but it just said "anonymous." The picture attached is one of the views Todd and I captured as we walked 300+ stairs to the stunning Pt. Reyes lighthouse in California last year. Even though our destination was the lighthouse, the beauty we consumed on the way was unimaginable. Surrounded by natural rock walls, there were tiny "windows" on the path allowing us to glimpse at what was ahead. We would stop, catch our breath, take a picture, laugh, exchange a kiss, and keep walking together. Every step of the journey to the lighthouse was the journey.

I find myself (and many other people I know) setting goals and deadlines and rushing through them to get to the end result. While this is useful and sometimes important in business transactions, how often do we follow this practice in our personal pursuits and miss the beauty of each moment? Whatever your journey is right now - in your marriage, career, children, even your struggles - remember there are little nuggets of joy and lessons waiting to be found in each step on the path.

The "Lure" of our addictions

I asked permission from the woman in this story to share the account of a lesson and blessing she received from a recent fishing trip. What a privilege to share her testimony of faith and courage as she is in addiction recovery...

She had been out on the pond bank for a few hours, tossing her line and reeling in, quietly pondering the day and feeling excited to be in a place where she felt peace. She was proud of her new fishing lure that her husband had just given her for her birthday. Fishing had become a solace for her, a place to just "be" and a healthy replacement for the bondage of her addiction. As she cast her line into the middle of the pond, she heard the discouraging snap of her line breaking, and her heart broke as she saw her new lure floating detached from the line in the middle of the pond. There was no wind that day, so she watched sadly as it floated alone in the big pond...broken, trapped, immobile, unreachable, stuck....and that's exactly how she felt. As much as she hated to lose her brand new lure, she left it behind and headed home. The anxiety of the loss loomed as she walked in the door to home. It was almost evening when the phone rang, and her sister was on the other line with the devastating news from the doctor that it was cancer. Her big sister, cancer, how could that be? Her husband was not home, and the loneliness and feelings of complete helplessness washed over her as she tried to manage the pain of the day. Her thoughts turned to her addiction - "maybe just one more time would be okay." She changed her mind realizing she had already come so far in her recovery. So, she said a prayer and asked God to help her resist the temptation. After her prayer, as the sun began to set, she headed back down to her same spot on the pond. The wind had now picked up, and within 20 minutes of her return to the water, she caught her lost lure! The excitement overwhelmed her, and she could not believe the "luck" she had received. After sharing the story with friends, family, and mentors, she began to realize through their tears and excitement that this had not been luck after all. This was an affirmation...a reminder from God of the victory over temptation. When she feels alone, stuck, and detached, she does not have to call on her unhealthy coping mechanisms to get her through. She must ask for help, get back up (or go back to the pond), and keep moving forward.

Unfortunately losses will happen, pain will happen, bad news will come. These things are devastating and certainly worthy of our sadness. It becomes detrimental, however, when our sadness turns to self-pity that fuels our addictions. Addictions provide an escape from the pain, but they keep us stuck in a cycle of numbing and inability to handle our feelings. Become aware of what "lures" you to use your unhealthy coping...and reel it back in with your healthy responses. It's okay to be sad...talk to someone about it and ask for help. You are never alone.

Singing in Harmony

When the opportunity for me to go back to school and become a therapist was presented, not only did Todd make sacrifices on my behalf, but he walked beside me and encouraged me on this path. He continues that journey with me as I have begun my new counseling practice. When I was approached with an opportunity to travel to Haiti and love on orphans…two different times now…Todd never questioned my obedience to this call. Not only did he support it, but he served as my prayer warrior at home sending notes of love and encouragement. He even inspired me to start this blog. He said he believes in me and enjoys what I write and encouraged me to share it with others. Our travel companions need our gratitude and love in return. Don’t forget to thank the ones who hold your hand on your journey and sing sweet harmony with you. Thank you, Todd. I love you.

Joy Unspeakable!

No words are needed to depict these sweet moments and faces. I hope you get a glimpse of the joy I received on this journey!

His Plan

Here’s another post from one of my blogs on “Sweet Sleep Journeys” (www.sweetsleep.blogspot.com)…

Our last day in Haiti reminded us that even though this particular journey is ending, we have a responsibility to take what God has shown us through this time and continue the journey at home...to continue to love and pray for these children and the people of Haiti and the plan God has for them. This was evident in the sweet time we shared with Rogelin (pictured with our team) just before we left. Our last team in February had the privilege of meeting Rogelin, so it was a joy to see him again and for this team to meet him as well. Here's a little background on his story...

During the earthquake Rogelin was out taking care of an errand for his father, and when he returned home he found his house destroyed with his parents inside. Grief-stricken and alone, he was found by the Global Orphan Project (GOP) and brought to the Orphan Transitional Village (OTV) where we stayed. His story was recently featured on 60 Minutes as part of GOP's piece about their work with orphans, specifically in Haiti. Rogelin is 15 years old and currently unable to attend school, but he shared with us his high hopes of continuing his education and one day becoming a doctor. When I asked him what kind of doctor, he excitedly responded, "for children!" Our team bonded with Rogelin immediately. He has such a servant's heart, as he was always by our side when we needed a translator to speak to the other children or just a helping hand with a project. His smile and joy are contagious. After one of our team times one night, he happened to join us at the end when I was closing us in prayer. I was crying, so when the prayer ended, he walked over and hugged me so tight. He was a sweet reminder of God's love and how we all share each other's pain. It was amazing how he responded to us and our needs considering how much he must be burdened himself through the tragic loss of his parents only months ago.

Before we departed for home, Rogelin asked us if our whole team would pray with him before we left. It was an honor to surround this amazing young man, lay our hands on him, and pray over his life and God's plan for it. We took this picture with him and printed him a copy to keep. Jen also gave him a Bible, wrote all our names in it, and signed it with Jeremiah 29:11 to remind him that Jesus has a very specific plan and purpose for his life. Praise God that the trials this incredible boy has been through can and will be used for the glory of God. He has a plan for Rogelin...and all of us!

Carry Each Other's Burdens

I was truly humbled by the love and service shown by my new friend Carline (pictured). I have often struggled with boundaries and helping others – how much is too much? How do I know the difference between “loving” and “fixing” others? How do I carry another’s burdens without taking on too much and jeopardizing my own spiritual and mental health? In Galatians 6:2 it says we are to “Carry each other’s burdens,” and then further along in verse 6 it says, “each one should carry his own load.” I have read in Cloud and Townsend’s “Boundaries” book that the important distinction here is between “burden” and “load.” Carline gave me the most incredible example of this concept...

I started the long and hot walk back to our village one evening after visiting the orphanage where I had spent precious time with Wendy, Woody, and Wilnes. I realized that I might not see them again, because we would be leaving the next day. This overwhelming sadness came over me, and I could not hold back the tears. I hoped my sunglasses would hide them, so Carline, walking alongside me, could not see them. Carline is one of the “mamas” at the orphanage. These mamas serve as a mother figure and take care of the orphans’ needs. When she saw my tears, she began pulling my backpack off my back. She cannot speak English, so this was her way of communicating to me that she wanted to help carry my burden. At first I would not let her, but she held up her hand and insisted in the English she knew, “no, I carry!” She then held my hand as we continued the walk home, and I cried out all my pain. When the tears dried up, she then handed over my backpack to carry on my own again. In Carline’s beautiful act of compassion, she carried my burden while I could not…and then gave it back to me when I was ready to carry my own load. Thank you, Carline.

Food for Thought

The orphans in Haiti receive one meal a day that contains their entire daily nutritional needs. It is always beans and rice, and they are elated to get it! They also receive a morning and evening snack, but the “meal” is intended to sustain them for the day. Can you imagine the same meal only once every day that you partake on the floor or wherever you can find a place to sit? Give thanks for your food today.

Jesus Loves Me

The love of these children is tremendous. Every time I thought I was doing something for them, they were really teaching and loving me! I gave them each a card with a note and picture of my family. I had an interpreter with me relaying to them that I would think of them and pray for them often, to which Wilnes replied, "please tell her we love her and will pray for her too!" I do not know how to put into words what it feels like to know there are 3 special little boys in Haiti praying for me. The video below is of them singing "Jesus Loves Me" in Creole. Enjoy!

Little Dolls

My Granddaddy used to call me his "little doll." I was so close to my sweet Granddaddy, so this, of course, was a compliment, and the little girl inside me still lights up when I think of how he would hold me and sing to me, his doll. During one of our visits to the orphanage, we gave sweet little dolls (hand-made with love by some women at BBC) to all the kids. They lined up with excitement to receive this gift of their very own...a gift they could love and hold and sleep next to at night. Wendy immediately gave his little doll a kiss and hug. Can you tell he's excited in the picture?! What great love can be held in a little doll!

The Joy of Giving

In the Miami airport on the way to Port-au-Prince, I bought a diet coke with a $20 bill and received three $5 bills and some ones. At that time I could not figure out why they did not just give me a 10 and a 5 instead of three 5's, but oh well, whatever. Fast forward to church on Sunday....I had Wendy, Woody, and Wilnes by my side worshipping the whole time. As the offering plate was being passed, I realized I still had those three $5 bills. I got them out of my purse and handed each of the boys $5. Their eyes beamed as if they had never seen such a thing. They knew to put in the plate, but it was cute to see them put it in their pockets first before the plate got to them. They were so excited to give...and out of their own pockets! Throughout the worship service they were all so excited to take turns holding and flipping through my Bible. It was such a joy to be able to present Wilnes with his very own Bible the next day. Sweet Sleep provided Bibles in Creole to all the orphans who could read...to read to themselves and the other orphans. This picture was taken after I gave Wilnes his Bible. I marked specific verses for him and singed it with love. Wendy and Woody listened as Wilnes read to them. It was an honor to witness such a precious moment in their lives.

A New Song sung in Creole

One morning as we sat during our team devotion time, I could hear in the distance the choir practicing the song, "When The Roll is Called Up Yonder." Can you just imagine this beautiful hymn being sung in Creole? It was such a reverent and peaceful moment for me. Each time I heard Haitian voices singing I thought of how these courageous people are singing a new song of praise to God - even through the tragedy they have experienced. Click on this video to experience the beautiful sound of children singing and praying in their native tongue.

Sweet Sleep in Haiti

This is a snippet from a blog I posted on Sweet Sleep's blog - www.sweetsleep.blogspot.com - Pictured are some sweet boys in their new beds!

I am on my second journey with Sweet Sleep in Haiti. I don't know why I thought I would be more prepared this time around. As I packed for the trip I even thought how much easier that process was this time because I knew what I needed and what to expect based on the last visit. But I was scared...I am scared, admittedly...of what God is showing me through this time. How do I pack for that?

One of the very first things we saw on this trip as we drove the streets was a "tap-tap" (a Haitian version of a taxi or trolley) with an interesting message on it. They are very brightly painted with words all over them, and in English it proudly proclaimed "Jesus was be here." We laughed and got a kick out of it - the same way these adorable Haitian children laugh at me when I totally botch their language in an attempt to communicate with them. We may not have all the words right, but there's always an important message underneath. That tap-tap now reminds me that Jesus was here, is here, and will always be here. However, that's too long to paint on a tap-tap, so "Jesus was be here" pretty much covers it.

We were able to take Sweet Sleep beds to a new orphanage. This particular orphanage is special to me because it houses 3 very special boys who have stolen my heart. I am so excited to be part of a team and ministry who supplies them with a new bed, sheets, and a bible. We had the opportunity to share God's love and give them a physical reminder of the rest, comfort, and covering that love brings...that "Jesus was be here" for them too! Thank you for praying and supporting our team and these incredible children.

Haiti Journey #2

I just returned home from another amazing trip to Port-au-Prince and its orphan villages. Words really cannot describe what I saw, felt, and experienced there, but in the posts to follow, I will do the best I can to recount the lessons and blessings I received. Most of those have to do with these precious boys - Woody, Wendy, and Wilnes.

My "fresh" face!

Hysterical! Right after I had the life changing experience of "No Mirrors" in Haiti, my fresh, no-makeup, tired, red face was published on the cover of Brentwood Baptist Church's MIssions Compass. It was their very first publication, and guess who was the cover shot? Check it out on their website along with more stories of Haiti... http://brentwoodmissions.com/giving.php

The Rocking Chair

I was stirring in bed one night about a month before our Sweet Sleep team was headed to Haiti. I was thinking about how blessed I am to have a bed to sleep in every night and what an incredible gift it is to these children that Sweet Sleep is able to provide a place to lay their precious heads. I was stirring, though, because my mind was racing with thoughts about other soothing and comforting things that could bring the orphans of Haiti and all over the world a sense of peace. I heard God in that moment, and I turned to my husband and said, “Rocking chairs, they need rocking chairs!”

In my counseling practice, I have learned about calming techniques and self-soothing, specifically after we have experienced sad or traumatic events in our lives. Have you ever noticed a nervous person pacing or a mama rocking her little child in her arms as he cries? This movement is a natural soothing mechanism for most. I felt this incredible well of sadness build as I realized these precious children do not have parents to hold or rock them. And then I thought, “what if we could teach them to soothe themselves by rocking?”

After my midnight stirring and quest for rocking chairs, Cracker Barrel graciously gave us two chairs to take on our trip to Haiti. I had no idea just how cool a story it would tell until I met a little boy there named Wendie. The orphanage leaders told me that he was basically an inconsolable child who would not interact with the other kids or talk much at all. I asked to spend some time with him. I sat with him and rocked in the rocking chair for about 30 minutes. I do not speak Creole, so I do not know for sure what the child started saying to me, but the main thing is that he started speaking! He also started smiling and playing with the other children. I am not a miracle worker. I just sat and rocked a frightened little child.

The rocking chair sits on the porch of the orphanage, and many of my teammates rocked other little orphans to sleep in it. I cannot begin to explain how precious it was to see these children find peace and comfort.

No Mirrors

This was a post I shared on Sweet Sleep's blog (sweetsleep.blogspot.com) from our last trip...

Sunday, February 28, 2010

No Mirrors
They have no mirrors here. The children do not know what they look like. They ask often for us to take their "photo, photo!" because they get so excited to see themselves on the screen after the flash goes off. They smile, they laugh, they praise God no matter what. These children have taught me many lessons so far, and this is one I learned today.

Yesterday my pocket mirror broke. I realized I am now like these children with no mirror here. So, I decided to look at myself through their eyes today. They were my mirror. So, first, before I go any further, let me describe what I looked like today on the outside - frizzy hair up in a hat, a trace of makeup, a big t-shirt (thanks, Em) and some scrub pants. When they saw me and all the team members, these children shouted for joy and grabbed for us like we had just hopped out of a limo to walk the red carpet. While they are definitely awestruck by my blonde hair and white skin, I began to realize it was not at all what I looked like that drew them to me or my teammates. They have a genuine desire to hold and be held...and unfortunately they do not get that often. What we are giving them cost us nothing...yet provided a gigantic return. And as we processed tonight as a team, we admitted it was nice to be loved, to be held, to be accepted by these precious children for no other reason but that we loved them.

This morning a child sitting in John's lap next to me in church took my bible and begin flipping through. His finger landed on a page, and he held it there for awhile. I could see some of my writing in the margin, so I was curious about the scripture. He was holding the page to Psalm 139. I know he couldn't read it, but it was interesting to me that he was holding the passage open...a passage that says he is fearfully and wonderfully made! I had marked that page, because it had a profound impact on me during one of my studies recently, and I had dated it so I would remember the moment. This child, a little over a month later, reminded me about that scripture and what it says about true identity and undconditional love. As the service went on, this same child was so comfortably resting in John's lap and arms that he eventually fell asleep. He was comfortable, he was loved, so he found "sweet sleep" resting in arms of love and compassion.

If you get a chance after reading this, check out Psalm 139 and find rest for YOU...the person He made you. Sit still and let God hold you in his arms...just as you are. No need for a mirror.

Much love,
Laura

Songs from Haiti

My recent trip to Haiti was completely life changing. In the posts to follow, I will share stories and pictures of some of those cool moments and precious children that I encountered. I am headed back one week from today, so there will be more wonderful songs to sing and share with you!

A New Song

I am not a blogger. I am not on facebook. I do not tweet. However, I have been told by several friends and family that I need to join the rest of society and get on board with one of these social networks! So, in taking their (and my own) advice, I am singing a new song!

I came up with the title "A New Song" because of the well-known concept of "same song, second verse." I feel like through most of my life I have been doing that - singing the same song and just changing up the verses to fit my needs and wants for the moment...only to be disappointed with the melody. It just never felt or sounded right. I am learning to sing a new song. It requires me to let go of how I think the song should sound or what it should say so I can live fully in the present every day. This allows the melody to flow richly and beautifully as I have relinquished control of trying to make it perfect.

Also, I am a new person. I don't sing the same song I used to sing. I am forgiven. I am blessed. I am a daughter of God. I am so many things that require me to sing a new song every day so that I do not fall back into the old patters of getting stuck and just changing up the verses.

I hope you enjoy "A New Song" blog posts, as I share what I am learning in my life through my personal experiences and in my counseling work. What song are you singing?